Leading change management in your organization? These are signs you don’t want to see.

Any organization can go from Point A to Point B on a project, but if you want to get there in one piece and ready to reap the benefits, you need great change management. If your organization is on a change journey and you’re feeling uneasy, look for these signs you might be doing change management wrong.

1. People are telling different stories about what’s happening.

If there’s confusion surrounding the change, its progression, or the future state, it’s a clear indicator that something’s wrong. Clear and consistent communication is crucial at every stage of the change process to ensure that everyone understands what’s happening and why.

Make sure you have:

• A simple message framework that outlines why the change is happening, what the change is, how you’ll move forward, and what the result will be.
• Executives aligned on that framework, so they don’t need emails or PowerPoint decks to speak authentically on the change.
• A change network of key people embedded in stakeholder groups.
• Communication assets and channels to arm your change network as they spread the right information.

2. Employees are avoiding project activities.

Resistance often arises because employees simply fear what they don’t understand. They might worry about job security, lack of confidence in new skills or behaviors, or how their roles might change.

• First, be as transparent as possible. If you don’t tell people what’s happening, they will fill those gaps on their own.
• Second, allay those fears by building the right comparisons into your communications. Creating connections between your change and other experiences makes people feel it’s familiar, which turns off fear, makes the change feel valuable, and helps people remember it.

3. Employees are less happy.

A decline in employee morale and productivity is a big red flag that your change management approach is not hitting home with your staff. They might feel that they have no control over what’s happening, and they won’t be able to perform. Those in managerial positions might resist a change that takes away responsibilities or decisions.

Even a big, challenging project shouldn’t leave people down in the dumps. One cure for the slump is to create a sense of optimism for the future. That means two things: success and control.

• Engineer small wins early in the project. Look for ways to make stakeholders think “I was successful with that. I can do something like this again.”
• Then let them take the wheel for a bit. Involve stakeholders in decisions, mapping out the journey, and framing the new possibilities for their teams. Give them choices between solutions, locations, timeframes, etc. Having input into one’s future is a powerful boost. Adding choice, structure, and predictability makes a big difference.

4. Employees are saying it’s not right for their team.

If everything about your project just feels wrong to employees, or worse, directly conflicts with how employees work and succeed day to day, you’ll fail.

• First, seek to understand your organizational or team culture. If you haven’t already, put it into words. List the unwritten rules for success in your workplace – things like values, norms, and communication styles.
• Then, intentionally build them into the change management strategy and activities. If project communications and activities just feel right to people, you’ll foster acceptance and adoption.

5. You’re getting déjà vu.

Are you seeing or hearing about some of the same problems over and over throughout your project? Or are they similar to issues you faced during other projects? Maybe you’re not getting enough intelligence to act on. You need ways to capture and address feedback and lessons learned.

• Early in the project, assess your change readiness in key areas. That will give you a chance to get ahead of issues.
• During the project and after implementation, conduct pulse checks and gather stakeholder feedback through your change agent network.
• Document lessons learned from the project team and stakeholder groups at the end of the project. Then make sure you store, share, and socialize them. Better yet, build “change history check” into your organization’s methodology.

Change is hard…

An organization’s change journey can make everyone feel uneasy, but it doesn’t have to be that way. Look for the signs discussed in this post to avoid doing change management wrong. If (and more realistically, when) problems pop up, turn them into opportunities. See these valuable signs for what they are, correct course and get your change management right.

Use your organizational values as a compass in an automated world.

Imagine walking into a workplace where decisions are made at the speed of light, tasks are completed with superhuman precision, and innovation is not just a buzzword but a daily reality.

This is the vision many organizations are chasing as they adopt artificial intelligence (AI). But as the AI landscape continues to evolve, some organizations are simply running to keep up, with no clear destination.

How do you know if you’re headed in the right direction? Our tip — check each milestone against your organizational values.

Why Values Matter in the Age of Automation

Without a strong set of values guiding AI, organizations find themselves in a maze of ethical difficulties and impersonal interactions.

For instance, what if an organization deployed AI chatbots for customer service without adequately addressing their limitations? This could frustrate customers and badly damage the brand.

Don’t automate processes without considering the implications and checking them against your values. Automation should enhance, not replace, the human touch. Every outcome should be aligned with the organization’s mission, vision, and values.

Without a strong set of values guiding AI, organizations find themselves in a maze of ethical difficulties and impersonal interactions.

The Role of Values in Decision-Making

Just because we can, does it mean we should? What guides our organizational decisions?

AI systems learn from historical data, which can contain biases. If the data are biased, the AI model might spread those biases. Imagine an AI-powered hiring tool that inadvertently discriminates against certain demographics due to biased historical hiring data. This could lead to unfair employment practices and even legal repercussions.

If, instead, the organization embeds its values into decision-making, it creates a culture of consistency and trust. Employees and other stakeholders understand that company actions are founded on those values.

Values and ethical rules should guide our decisions, not software features. Values ensure that as we delegate tasks to machines, we’re not also outsourcing our ethical responsibilities.

Just because we can, does it mean we should?

Protecting the Human Heart in a Digital World

As we embrace the incredible potential of advanced automation, let’s not forget the human heart beating at the core of our organizations. It’s the passion of the people, guided by clear and compassionate values, that will ensure technology enhances our work rather than defines it.

For instance, a hospital may have AI-driven diagnostic tools that are incredibly accurate, even revolutionary. But healthcare workers know that delivering a diagnosis without empathy will cause patients anxiety and distress. The most successful organizations will be those that harness the power of automation without discarding human insight.

Automation should enhance, not replace, the human touch.

So, let’s program our future with not only intelligence, but with wisdom and foresight. As our capabilities grow, so can our humanity.

Three Takeaways for Optimizing AI

Values are the compass. In a world steered by automation, clear organizational values provide direction and purpose, ensuring that every technological advancement serves the greater mission.

Ethics determine the heading. As automation becomes more prevalent, the temptation to prioritize efficiency over ethics can grow. Maintaining clear values helps resist this temptation and fosters a culture of integrity.

Advanced automation is a crew member, not the captain. While automation can greatly enhance efficiency and decision-making, it should not inhibit the passion and judgment of the people that make up the organization.

As the lines between human intuition and AI are blurring, clear organizational values have never been more crucial. As we sail into the uncharted waters of AI, these values are the stars by which we navigate, ensuring we don’t get distracted by shiny new software and lose sight of our humanity.

Our government is apparently not a fan of TikTok, but they seem to love other innovative technology — especially AI. US federal agencies are starting to harness the power of generative artificial intelligence (AI) to improve efficiency, decision-making, and service delivery.

For instance, the Department of Health and Human Services (HHS) could use generative AI to model complex public health scenarios, helping them form policies and response strategies. Similarly, the Department of Defense (DoD) is exploring generative AI for simulation and training purposes, to give personnel realistic and varied practice scenarios.

AI promises big benefits, but beware — there are three pitfalls government teams should consider as they approach AI projects.

Consider ethics and policy.

As federal agencies adopt generative AI, they must keep ethics and policy implications at the forefront. They need clear guidelines on data usage, privacy, and security. They must also ensure that AI-generated content is unbiased and equitable; government decisions based on AI outputs can have significant impacts on the lives of US citizens.

As federal agencies adopt generative AI, they must keep ethics and policy implications at the forefront.

Hire and train for the AI-enabled agency.

Generative AI will change the work performed within federal agencies. This is a good thing; AI can take over repetitive tasks, freeing up human workers for more complex and creative work. But that workforce must be prepared to get all the benefits of AI. Agencies should consider AI technology skills as they recruit and hire. They must also invest in training to help employees perform in an AI-augmented workplace.

Generative AI will change the work performed within federal agencies. This is a good thing.

Manage it like any other change.

Integrating AI technology into federal agencies is an organizational change, like any other. Agencies will not see the workforce adoption they need – and the benefits they expect – without effective change management. Dedicated change management teams help federal organizations navigate the complexities of the new technology, address resistance, and promote employee engagement and adoption. The right communication, training, and support minimizes disruption and maximizes the benefits of generative AI, fostering an environment where innovative tools like AI enhance employee performance and service delivery.

Dedicated change management teams help federal organizations navigate the complexities of new technology.

Generative AI offers federal agencies exciting opportunities to innovate and improve their operations. But each opportunity comes with the responsibility to implement AI ethically and support the workforce. As generative AI continues to evolve, it will be fascinating to see how federal agencies leverage this technology to serve the public better.

HR professionals must think of themselves as change agents.

Perhaps no role is shifting faster than the HR professional. If the pandemic showed us anything, it was that the employee experience is essential to survival. HR is not only helping navigate choppy post-pandemic waters, but also evolving into a true strategic partner.

This is not just about external catalysts or inclusion in strategic decisions. It’s about mindset. HR professionals must start thinking of themselves as change agents.

For example, a global company wanted to launch a development program to change the behaviors of its leaders, world-wide. Other initiatives like this had flopped, but this one was a smashing success. Why? In part, it was because HR itself made some significant behavior changes of its own.

1. From understanding business needs to forecasting them.

Having ears to the ground, HR could see early on that the business model was shifting from individual contribution to team performance. Soon, leaders would have to work with multiple global cross-functional project teams and get them to collaborate quickly to drive business outcomes. Because HR anticipated this need, the program was not merely a reaction to a problem; it was a proactive solution.

How they did it:  HR claimed a “seat at the table” and participated in business decisions. They held regular meetings with employees and managers and asked the right questions. They also conducted frequent pulse surveys to gauge the mood of the employee base and respond.

2. From tracking metrics to owning Key Performance Indicators (KPIs).

The HR team committed to employee engagement (a company KPI) instead of focusing on tactical metrics like total training hours or training feedback scores.

How they did it: They kept organizational goals front-and-center during every conversation and work session. They brainstormed with their internal clients to identify the right HR success metrics to achieve employee engagement and to drive the desired employee behaviors. For example, training didn’t end in the classroom but was followed by simulations and mentoring to ensure that the learning stuck and leaders managed their teams optimally.

3. From understanding diversity to fostering inclusion.

Even though corporate headquarters was in the U.S., the move to team performance was global. HR knew many typical elements of training and communication didn’t resonate globally, so they paid special attention to that.

How they did it: HR crunched the numbers to identify real data on diversity. Then, they used the quantitative results to make the program culturally inclusive. For example, they knew that employees in other countries might be alienated if the company continued to use U.S. baseball metaphors. So they asked their geo stakeholders to share their stories and metaphors, then applied the lens of local culture to all experiences.

4. From following HR trends to focusing and executing the most relevant trends.

The HR team had a good sense of multi-generational workplace and digital revolution, but they decided to thoroughly examine how these trends impacted the company and how best to manage them.

How they did it: HR read the research and reached out to networks and business stakeholders to get their input. They investigated trends and analyzed impacts. These findings guided all relevant HR actions. They made sure the communications, training, and tools they rolled out resonated with the target audiences. For example, they used the latest technology platform to engage digitally savvy millennials who were primed to be future leaders.

As HR became more involved with company strategy and their stakeholders, they better understood their pivotal role in all organizational change. HR is responsible for promoting employee behavior change. That starts with changing their own behaviors.

Executive Facilitation

Part 6: Signs your executive session was a success.

You facilitated an executive working session and you think it went well! You think… How can you know?

Here’s what you might hear and observe after a solid session.

“This was great.”

It’s not the most rigorous test of your facilitation, but it matters. How people feel coming out of the room is important. It means they feel it was a good use of their time, and they’ll approach your next session with enthusiasm.

What to do when you hear this: Conduct a pulse survey to drill down on why people liked the session. And consider one-on-one check-ins with a few participants to get more detail: what they liked and what improvements you could make.

“This is the new way of doing it.”

Sometimes a session or activity feels so effective that leadership wants to adopt it as a standard practice. That’s a great sign that your session worked.

What to do when you hear this: Document your facilitation process and tools. Post them in a shared folder and let people know where they can find your files.

How people feel coming out of the room is important. If they feel it was a good use of their time, they’ll approach your next session with enthusiasm.

“Remember what we said during our meeting?”

When participants reference the ideas, skills, or decisions you made during the session, that means your session is resonating and making an impact.

What to do when you hear this: Capture those things that are resonating and make sure everyone has access to them.

“I’m following up on my action item.”

At the end of a good executive session, you define next steps and responsibilities. When you see those things happening, the session is making a difference. You’ve taken the value out of the room and into the organization.

What to do when you hear this: Celebrate and normalize. Share who’s moving the ball forward; this will nudge others with to-dos to do the same.

“We’re kicking off the project.”

Many strategic working sessions are convened to make strategic decisions. Those decisions turn into strategic projects. You can feel good if the rubber is hitting the road, with projects funded and underway.

What to do when you hear this: Keep an eye on the project born during your session. Document your success story: you gathered the right people and they produced something impactful!

“Here are the numbers.”

Strategic decisions are intended to make an observable, positive impact. Hopefully, the actions and initiatives born in your session end up showing those results. That’s the ultimate sign that you made a difference.

“Let’s do this every year.”

If your executive session felt right to leadership, produced sound ideas and decisions, and generated positive outcomes, it had obvious value. Leadership might feel so good about it that it becomes an essential tool for your organization. Well done, facilitator!

ICYMI: Executive Facilitation Series Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4 & Part 5

Launching AI? This is what your Change Lead wakes up thinking about.

Every day, I talk to people leading technology projects for our clients and the Emerson change leads who support them. No surprise that the coolest projects are in the Artificial Intelligence space.

Organizations are modeling operational scenarios on production lines and making data-driven decisions using AI. They are using AI to better schedule their truck fleet routes and drivers, getting products to customers faster and at a lower cost. They are improving their employees’ digital experience through AI-enabled chatbots that solve their problems in the moment of need.

As IT project teams are focused on seamless delivery of AI to the business, here’s what a project’s change management leads wake up in the morning thinking about.

Are the Executives on this AI initiative all on the same page?

This typically happens when they’re trying to document the messages that should go to the impacted audiences. When this happens, the change lead often hits the “pause” button to ensure that sponsors and change agents are communicating clearly and consistently. They get key leaders aligned on the problem we are solving, the way we describe the solution, the approach, and the results we will achieve.

Have we identified all the impacted audiences for this AI project?

Will an unidentified audience “come out of the woodwork?” Ideally, key leaders participate in the current-state and future-state workshops at the start of the AI project. The change lead documents all the audiences and captures the new ways of working for each audience. They identify what each group will gain and lose with the introduction of AI, how best to communicate with them, what they need to know-learn-do to be successful. This detailed impact “topography” is the basis of every change intervention that comes after, so it’s important to get it right. So, after they think they have identified all the impacts, change leads follow up with each audience to validate their understanding. What they’re asking is, “Are these all the stakeholder impacts? Is there anyone we‘ve missed?”

What’s the best way to reduce fear and engage stakeholders?

Change leads try to figure out what makes each impacted audience tick; they use that to engineer an AI change strategy. A good change team uses what motivates each stakeholder group to help them engage in a positive way with the impending changes. Change leads also use that knowledge to come up with creative ways to focus attention on the change. For example, Emerson change leads engineer adoption by pulling three levers: they use what feels familiar to stakeholders, they give impacted audiences a sense of control, and create successes during the project so that employees feel safe and confident moving forward.

Change leads try to figure out what makes each impacted audience tick; they use that to engineer an AI change strategy.

AI is transformational. The nature of AI is that it gets smarter the more people use it. A change lead is the only member of your AI project with a laser focus on getting people to use your new, fantastical AI technology. The success of your AI initiatives, and the ROI of the investment, hinges on your ability to ready the workforce and customers to ensure they embrace the transformation.

For more information on the right way to engage the workforce in AI initiatives, read Artificial intelligence and your workforce: Three tips for leaders.

Executive Facilitation

Part 4: Techniques to make sure your executives get what they came for.

There are few things in shorter supply than an executive’s time. When invited to a working session, they worry about wasting hours with nothing to show for it.

If you’re running an executive working session, you want them to leave thinking it was time well spent—that they achieved the outcomes they needed and know what to do next, to make it real.

Here are six tips.

Tip #1: Establish desired outcomes.

The only way to get to the right place in the end is to begin with the end in mind.

That means getting consensus on the outcomes of the session well before it starts—when you send invitations. Then, confirm those outcomes in the room.

What do we mean by outcomes? That depends on your organization and your group. Outcomes might include strategies, decisions, operating models or principles, plans, schedules, or conceptual frameworks. Make sure you define them well. What would a good outcome look like? Does it have words, visuals, lists, timelines, assignments of responsibility…?

Also, identify any specific decisions that the group either must make or is not going to make. This can help avoid misguided energy during your session. Sometimes, participants push for a decision instead of properly exploring the topic because they think a decision will be made in the meeting. You don’t want people slipping into “selling mode” when it’s not the right time for it.

Once you agree on outcomes, let them guide the session. Check often to make sure you’re on track to get to them by the end of the session. Use those outcomes to prioritize topics or activities.

Tip #2: Set the rules and enforce them.

Come up with a few ground rules. You’re not being rigid; you’re proactively removing obstacles to your outcomes.

For example, set the timing: start time, end time, and break times. Consider setting a rule that you resume work on time and don’t stop to help late joiners catch up. Decide how to prioritize and focus the work; some facilitators use a “parking lot” (white board, flip chart, or PowerPoint slide) for off-topic discussions, so you stop them but don’t lose them.

Ask participants to voice any objections and then agree verbally to the rules. This will help the group self-correct when it goes off-track.

Tip #3: Prepare the group for productivity.

Think about any obstacles you might encounter with your particular set of participants.

For example, do you have a participant at odds with the others on a particular issue? Get ready to deal with that. You might want to shore up the minority position or, if the participant is just impeding progress, you might frame his or her objections as out of scope; put them in the parking lot and follow up later.

Do you have participants of different ranks? You’ll have to create a level playing field. Maybe make sure the lower-ranking people contribute first, so their ideas aren’t dampened by a boss with a different view. Or gather some ideas from those with less power ahead of time, and prompt participants to share them.

Tip #4: Minimize the troublemakers.

We’ve all been there. One person in the group seems to be taking up all the air. Or worse, they’re actively undermining the group. Lucky you, facilitator, they’re your problem now. Here are some tips:

• Make it a rule. Set an expectation, up front, that participants will stay on-topic, let others speak, and work collaboratively.
• Redirect them. First, assume good will; the troublemaker might not be aware that they’re a problem. Call them out, politely, and ask to hear from others. For example, “Thanks for your input, Jim. I want to make sure we hear all the ideas in the room. Carol, do you have any thoughts on this?”
• Suffocate them. Not literally, but don’t give them airtime. Direct questions to other participants and, if necessary, ignore their comment and pivot to another subject or participant.
• Use your physical presence. Move across the room to stand next to them—or even stand with your back to them – and address the rest of the group.
• Enlist the group. Reward good participants. Encourage constructive, on-topic, collaborative behaviors with praise and reinforcement. Often, the group will move onto the right path and shut the troublemaker out.

Tip #5: Maintain momentum.

As facilitator, your job is to keep the group moving toward those outcomes. Here are a few ways:

• Ask questions to clarify, elaborate, guide, or show the group where there’s a gap in their thinking. Validate, reflect back, and connect dots.
• Exercise patience. Sometimes progress is messy. Give the group the time they need for organic discussion and idea generation.
• Shut up. People love to fill silence. If no one is talking, just wait and they will. And, in any case, make sure you’re only speaking as needed to facilitate. If you’re talking a lot, there’s something wrong. Don’t do the work for them or put words in their mouths. You want participants to own the results of the session; that will happen only if they land on the solutions themselves. We want to share back what we’re hearing to validate it, and connect dots, but we want them to form the conclusions
• Check progress and focus. Breaks are a good time to decide whether your pace and direction are right. Assess this yourself and/or ask a few participants what they think. Is the group hitting the milestones? Are they filling out the picture they need at the end? If not, when the group reconvenes, reset them toward their goals.

Tip #6: Close with clarity.

Did the group produce what they wanted? Show them! Play back what they produced, get consensus that it’s right, then plan to take it forward.

Confirm any decisions they made, then build a cascading messaging plan. This plan defines how to handle the decisions, information, or concepts coming out of the session—what should be kept confidential and what should be shared with the rest of the organization. Next, decide which information goes to which groups. Finally, agree on the talking points and terms to use when delivering the messages. Establish activities, responsibilities, and a timeline. Importantly, define the very next step to be taken for each key decision and schedule a follow-up meeting to check in. This will create momentum and give the group a quick win.

Don’t let your great work stay in the room—use your session outcomes as a launching pad to make a real impact on your business.

ICYMI: Executive Facilitation Series Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 5 & Part 6

Wrap up the year with effective goal setting.

It’s the end of the year, and most organizations are embarking on everyone’s favorite holiday activity: goal setting.

Leaders analyze the past year’s performance and estimate what they can and must accomplish in the coming year. Executives then review these goals and finalize organization-wide, measurable objectives that drive success.

This annual exercise is necessary, and it makes sense. But why is it so hard?

First, each role has its own relationship to goals. Top leaders want to dominate the market but must also consider the health of the organization. Executives and managers want to push for greatness but also take morale and capabilities into consideration.  Employees feel pressure to impress the boss but have to balance that impulse with what they think is realistic and achievable.

And, after all that work and rounds and rounds of reviews, the final goals are cascaded down to the organization, which can be like a game of telephone. By the time a line employee gets his work objectives, they might no longer be recognizable to top leadership.

So, as a leader, how should you approach annual goal setting? A clear process and sound principles will make strong goal setting easier on everyone.

Listen up.

Teams understand their capabilities and limitations, and if given a safe platform, they will tell you what they really think. It’s good to be aspirational, but make sure you propose goals the team believes in and feels inspired to achieve.

A clear process and sound principles will make strong goal setting easier on everyone.

Align up, down, and across.

Departmental goals should directly support organizational goals, and departmental goals need to make sense across teams and divisions. As you translate overall goals to objectives for teams and employees, check them against the strategy. This type of alignment is critical to business strategy and execution — every part should contribute to the whole.

Balance.

Make sure your goals are balanced across your strategic and operational capabilities. Don’t set one goal so high that achieving it saps energy from other areas or from overall productivity. Discuss where your key balancing metrics are, like volume and customer experience, and allocate investment and resources across those areas, not just those that obviously hit the bottom line.

Share now.

Employees need to know as soon as possible what they are being measured against. The later you share this information, the higher the risk. On January 2, your teams are already supposed to be working toward the new year’s goals. They need time to shift and ramp up. So, give employees a preview of the new year’s priorities. This is especially important if your company ties goals to merit pay; this is not an area where employees want to be surprised.

Employees need to know as soon as possible what they are being measured against.

Review and support, often.

Create a safe space for employees to report on their progress and ask for help where they feel stuck – otherwise goals can feel punitive. Give people space to tell the most accurate story of where they are so you can support them. That’s a win-win.

Goal setting has big impacts on productivity, morale, and the bottom line. Make sure you use this time to create meaningful goals that help your business succeed and your people thrive.

Three considerations before launching your tech pilot.

Smart teams think about people during their digital transformation pilots. They know that the employee’s digital experience is where the IT investment is realized. The most fantastical tech is worthless if no one is using it — or using it right.

How do you get the most from your pilot? Put change management in the cockpit.

Here are three things to think about:

Don’t wait to start change management.

Before the pilot, you should have conducted a change impact assessment. This will tell you which stakeholders are affected and how. Select your pilot testers and construct test cases based on those real-life impacts.

Smart teams know that the employee’s digital experience is where the IT investment is realized.

Also, be thoughtful about the messages you’re sending as you test. The impact assessment will tell you what certain user groups will gain and what they will lose. Use the key points of the overall project message — the problem, solution, approach, and results — then customize those messages for your testers. It’s a great opportunity; they will report back to their work teams and set the tone for your go-live.

Test as much as you can.

Don’t just test the tech. Try out your communications and training on the pilot group. As you do, keep the focus on testing assets and assumptions. Don’t let perfection get in the way; a pilot is for gathering information to make things better.

And measure! Collect data on users’ readiness for the new technology and how well they adopted new ways of working. Your exposure is limited in the pilot, but you can learn so much that will inform the rollout.

Create your go-live playbook.

Record your results, tester feedback, and your lessons learned. Assemble the change management tools you tested, like the communications and training assets. Create an updated set, incorporating what you learned, to guide the team for your go-live. Package your roadmap and recommendations for the rollout.

Your digital transformation pilot will test whether your technology is ready.

It’s also the perfect setting to learn what will “fly or die” with your impacted audiences. Don’t take off without change management in your pilot’s cockpit.

Active listening is a behavior we can improve.

You’re telling a colleague about something that happened yesterday. You finally drop the most surprising part of the story, and you’re met with a blank look and “uh-huh.” In that instant, you know they haven’t been listening. Their eyes shift from a point across the room back to your face and they realize they’ve been caught.

It doesn’t feel good, does it? It might feel even worse for your colleague, who realizes they have been outed as insincere, at best.

Next time, you might avoid confiding in that person. They might feel uncomfortable around you. It might not be a big deal, but it certainly didn’t make your relationship stronger.

Humans have a fundamental need to be seen and heard.

Listening is respect; it lays the foundation for trust-based relationships and shared understanding, without which teams can’t succeed.

So how do we become good listeners? Active listening is a behavior we can improve and, like all behaviors, it requires both “being” and “doing.” Think of your being state as your attitude and intention. The doing state is observable behavior.

How to Be

1. Be neutral. This is a variation on mindfulness, or non-judgmental awareness. Being human is messy; the person who is speaking has emotions and thoughts that might not seem logical or sensible to you. And they don’t have to! Don’t feel like you must respond right away. Suspend your judgment. First, just listen and try to understand.
2. Be curious. Imagine the two of you are carrying backpacks into the conversation. The backpacks are full of experiences and habitual emotional responses built up over a lifetime. To listen well, take off your backpack. Forget yourself for a little while and experience what the other person is saying from their point of view.
3. Be regulated. Sometimes we hear things that bring up our own discomfort. Try to regulate your physiology so you don’t react to your own internal responses. That will help you stay present. In other words, “practice the pause.”

What to Do

1. Tune in. Eliminate distractions. If you’re face-to-face, start by turning off your devices. If you’re connecting remotely, turn on your camera and minimize other windows. Give yourself and the other person the gift of space they can fill with their message.
2. Take in what is happening in front of you. As you listen, what are you seeing and perceiving? What kind of energy or mood state is this person demonstrating? What’s their rate of speech? How is their breathing? What are their gestures and eyes doing? Once you do that, you can confirm that you are beginning to understand. For example:
3. Check in. Share something like, “I noticed you got quiet when you talked about your performance review” or, “When you talked about that project, you seemed excited.”
4. Use their words. If someone says they’re frustrated, you can simply say, “Frustrated.” If someone says they enjoy project management, you can say, “You enjoy project management.”
5. Sometimes people just want to vent. They’re not looking for a solution, but rather an open and safe space to hear themselves think. Before inserting your ideas or opinion, ask, “Do you want to be heard, or do you want me to offer feedback?” Then make good on their answer. And if you’re at a loss, ask, “How can I help?”

The more you practice, the stronger your active listening muscle will get. As you turn active listening into a daily habit, you’ll promote an inclusive and productive culture and more easily sustain high-performing relationships at work and in life.